To sleep or not to sleep...

About four weeks ago, the ninja entered a "sleep-regression" cycle. Essentially, my sweet little blessing that was sleeping 10-12 hours a night inexplicably started rousing in the wee hours. I could get her back to sleep, but it has been happening more and more frequently. In addition, she won't nap well during the day unless we are at home, and even then it's a fight to the death.

So, Monday begins official scheduling boot camp. Until now, I've been pretty flexi-mexi with the whole scheduling thing - parent directed/child led mixture. But, no more. Because mommy can't take the chaos anymore! :-)

The point of this ranting however, steers more toward the deep, loving, tender heart of God. ...Woah, Jules...how did we get from scheduling to the Father heart of God. Walk with me, friends....

So, this morning, I decided a nap was a non-negotiable. Yesterday was a rough day for our sweet blessing, and in turn a rough day for her sweet parents. As I was trying to coax, lull and otherwise knock her into a nap  (ha!), 

she fought me. 

and fought me. 

and. 

fought. 

me. 

.......breathe. just breathe.......

So, as is my custom, I started praying over her little heart, mind and spirit. Praying the peace of God would rest on her, that the Holy Spirit would comfort her, that Jesus would be near and help her to rest. Mind you, she is crying and writhing around under my gentle hand laid on her back. 

And then He did it...as He always does...tenderly, gently, quietly, and to my heart of hearts with peace...

"This looks like you." 

So often my Lord tries to quiet my spirit. He speaks words of peace over me. He gently lays his hand on my back and puts the proverbial pacifier in my mouth. And he waits. He stands guard by my side and soothes me. Yet, I writhe under his gentle hand. I squirm and cry and scream and think that the world is going to end. I will never eat again, never play again, and by all means I will miss something dreadfully essential to my now. And all the while, he knows I am just tired. I just need to take a rest. To close my eyes, still my spirit and rest. 

I'm thankful for His gentle words. His gentle reminders. And His care for my well being. He only wants the best for me in this life, and for that to happen, I must listen to his gentle prodding. 

For those who are wondering...she fell alseep after about 25 minutes of coaxing. Hopefully, she will learn my cues and remember how good she feels when she wakes...except that she has the memory of an earthworm. Come to think of it, so do I sometimes....