The Condemnation Curve

A striking thought hit me the other day. My children were watching Frozen....again....for the 9 millionth time...this week.....(an exaggeration of course...or is it?) Anyway, I wondered what the true average screen time is for kids out there these days. I mean if we mamas were all really honest about the numbers, what it would be? And then (as my mind often does) I started thinking about all the things that I want an average for when it comes to my kids...

Height, Weight, head circumference?

Sugar intake?

How many times a day is this kid supposed to eat (cause good gracious she's like a vacuum mixed with a goat lately)?

Outside playtime?

Social interaction with other kids?

Sleeping?

Fruits & Veggies?

Counting? ABC's? Phonics?!

Smoothies?

Bacon?....Maybe that one was for me? :-)

I just want to know what all the other mama's out there are doing and if I'm "lining" up with the norm. I want a scale, a ruler, to see if I'm doing ok at this molding-of-little-lives-gig. And if I'm not, maybe I should call in the cavalry. Seek advice. GET. HELP. Because sweet Lord they watched a little too much Frozen this week and I posted about those suckers they ate in the grocery store. And I'm pretty sure I'm not giving each of them enough Independent Playtime or face time or quiet time or sensory activities.....and...and...and...You're just raising a generation of lazy, under stimulated, sugar addicted couch potatoes!!!

And then....Jesus. "There is no condemnation..."

And I realized all the other mama's out there are asking the same questions. We all want the same scale. The same stamp of approval from all the others who don't have the answers either. We read the books and the articles and all the things hoping that we are measuring up to the standard that some person who isn't the parent of these children decided was where they needed to be on that all-condemning "curve."

I'm pretty sure no one goes to college still needing a diaper at night or still wanting their paci. But the condemnation we put on ourselves if our children aren't meeting those arbitrary "shouldn't need that anymore" timeframes are rendering us full of guilt and anxiety.

Be free, mama. Be free that the Creator of the heavens and the earth, the one who set planets in orbit and created life from dust gave these children to your care. YOUR. CARE. You partnered with Him and created a life that He has given you charge over. Trust your gut. Trust your instincts. Strive to be a better mother to ever-growing and developing children. Strive to challenge their minds and hearts and imaginations. Get outside your comfort zone with food, activities, books, and adventures. But never let the curve get so into your psyche that you miss the joy of having these tiny people by your side. Your son WILL learn to go poo-poo in the potty.  One day, your daughter will...God help us all...eat those vegetables. That paci will eventually find it's way to the trash and the toddler will stop eating chalk and sand. But the memory of your 3 year old naming herself Elsa, her sister Anna, her mother Olaf and her father Sven...and then calling all of you that for the rest of the car ride...will live on in the warmest of places in your heart.