It's been a while...

Almost 3 years since I last posted here. Reading back over some of the old blogs, I'm struck with the changes I have gone through. 3 children in 3 years and a community that will help you press into the Lord when you have no strength left will do that to you. Astounding how my worldview has changed. I continue to stand amazed at the Lord's redemption, refinement and re-development of His own. 

I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. ~ Ezekiel 36:26


After some encouraging from those dear to me, my hands rest again on black keys. I have recently come to the realization that I must write. It's not for the reader that I put letters into print, but for myself. As a mother of three under three, it's one of the very few things I've identified that I do solely for myself. Even showering feels like it's for the benefit of those around me most days. (Mama's, I know you feel me.)

My days are filled with words. Words pour from my lips all day. All. Day. Long. The children make sure of it. Bless them. Sometimes the Lord graces my tongue like rich red wine being poured. It rolls around the glass smooth and inviting. Other times words tumble clumsy, like milk gone bad, clumpy and foul. But the words pour none the less.

But only when I sit alone, still and quiet long enough to dig through the diapers and sippy cups and crumbled goldfish crackers do the words become alive. My heart pounds a little harder, my mind frantically searching for the right combination of text to express what the mind's eye can see. It's in these moments of solace that I can get the thoughts and ideas out. That the things I think finally begin to make sense and clarity can be grasped. The thoughts don't fully make sense until they come out through my hands. What a realization. What grace. I believe I have finally found my place of rest. And it is in words.

I'm not completely sure that I will continue to blog here amongst these old ponderings. They just aren't me anymore, but they got me to where I am today. Stay tuned...and thanks for reading.